Stolen from Simply Jews
(A Russian joke, loosely translated)
A Russian orthodox Priest dies and goes to Heaven. Upon arrival, he is being greeted by Jesus who hands him the keys to a Volga* and offers to take him for a ride of sightseeing. They drive for a while, enjoying the beauty of the paradise, the birds of paradise, the sun of paradise etc, when an Imam on a big brute of a BMW, with a bottle of whiskey in one hand and speakers blazing at full volume easily overtakes their Volga.
"What the heck...", blubbers and sputters the Priest, looking questioningly at Jesus.
"Well, you see, the man was a teetotaler his whole life, so he deserves a consideration in Heaven", is the answer.
So they proceed with the trip and all is well, and then a Catholic Abbot in a huge Chevrolet, chock full with semi-dressed ladies, loudspeakers etc, overtakes their Volga.
"And what was that now?" cries the old Priest, almost choking on bile.
"The man was celibate for so long, so now he is allowed to have a go at it", replied Jesus.
The Priest barely suppresses his ire, when a humongous golden Bentley with a few rabbis, crates of drink, blaring music and girls swishes by and disappears over the horizon.
"Don't even ask, cause I simply don't know," turns Jesus to the Priest, "these are some of Dad's buddies.
(*) A Russian car, a real clunker.