fousesquawk
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The Godmother
Starring Anthony Weiner as Fredo
Fredo
"Rolling Stone raves, "Anthony Weiner nails Fredo!"
February 2011
The Godmother's limousine pulls into the driveway of her Hempstead, NY home. Weary from a long trip in which she narrowly escaped a revolution against a friendly dictator, she steps from the car and, escorted by her bodyguards, trudges up the icy driveway to the front door.
Slumping onto the living room sofa, the Godmother asks for a cold hand towel.
"Pretty close call over there in Cairo, eh?" asks one of her men.
"Yeah. A lotta deals went down the can with that one. Where's Bill?"
""He's off on some speaking gig. He sends his love." (hat tip John Speedie)
The Godmother lights a cigarette and stares at her men. She senses something is wrong.
"What is it?" she asks.
The men in the room look downward.
""C'mon. Let's have it."
Finally, one of the men responds:
"It's your brother. He's in trouble again."
"You mean Huey?"
"No. Fredo. We got a call from Huma yesterday. Seems there's more pictures going around."
At that the Godmother picks up a lamp next to the soda and flings it across the room. The men remain silent.
"Where is Huma now?" she asks.
"She's at home-working."
"Which job?"
"I don't know," answers one of the men.
"What do you mean you don't know?" screams the Godmother. "Why is it every time I ask a question I can never get a straight answer out of you #*^#!s?"
The Godmother gets up and starts pacing back and forth.
"I told Fredo the first time that he broke my heart. Now it happens again."
"Maybe we could send him out to one of our casinos in Vegas just to get him away from here," suggests one of the men.
"Yeah, right," shoots back the Godmother. "What makes you think Fredo could run a casino. Besides, he'd be sending those pictures to cocktail waitresses two or three at a time."
"Youse want we take him on a little fishing trip out on da lake?' asks one of the men.
The Godmother sits back down and lights another cigarette. She takes a long drag and thinks.
"Not now. Not yet. I don't anything to happen to Fredo while Michael is still mayor of New York."
She slumps further into the sofa.
"You know, I'm starting to think it's time for me to get out of this racket for a while-at least until 2016. I'm thinking of turning over the operations to GianKarlo while I get ready for the big enchilada."
"GianKarlo?" ask the men in unison. But Godmother, GianKarlo isn't ready for this job. He's still a boy. He'll screw everything up big time."
"What the Hell difference does it make anyway? Our foreign investments are all screwed up as it is. It's about time he grows up. Go find him. Where is he?"
"He's out on da lake, Godmother."
"Go get him. I'm going to bed. Oh, and tell Fredo all is forgiven. He can come home now."
"I think I see him pulling into the driveway now."
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