It seems a passenger in a wheel chair delayed a New York City bus. A female passenger is angry because she is going to be late. Listen to the guy, also a passenger, explain why the bus is late, and give her several suggestions of what she can do about it. Hilarious. This is so New York.
Funny Nice Guy NYC Bus Passenger
Here’s a small snippet of flavor: (Obvious Language Alert)
You know what it is? You upset because you got a bulls**t a$$ job, and you late to your bulls**t a$$ job. You can’t buy a car, so you got a bulls**t a$$ job…Ask your boss for a raise, by a car. You won’t have to ride the f**king bus.
Bus Passenger Schools Angry Female Passenger (video)
The traditional Chanukah dreidel (spinning top) is a throwback to the times when the Greek armies of King Antiochus controlled the Holy Land, before the Maccabees defeated them and sent them packing. The powerful regime passed a series of laws outlawing the study of Torah and many of the mitzvot. The Jews were compelled to take their Torah learning "underground," for they knew that a Jew without Torah is like a fish out of water.
Jewish children resorted to learning Torah in outlying areas and forests. Even this plan was not foolproof, for the enemy had many patrols. The children therefore brought along small tops that they would quickly pull out and play with after secreting away their texts, so that they could pretend to be merely playing games.
Our Chanukah dreidel games are a salute to these Jewish heroes of yore.
The classic dreidel is a four sided spinning top made of wood, plastic, or the proverbial clay. On the four sides of the dreidel appear four letters from the Hebrew alphabet-nun (נ), gimmel (ג), hey (ה), and shin (ש). These four letters are an acronym for "nes gadol hayah sham"-"a great miracle happened there."
In Israel, the actual setting of the Chanukah miracle, the last letter, shin, is substituted with a pey (פ), which stands for "po"-"here."
All players sit around the playing area.
The "ante" is equally divided amongst all players.
Everyone takes a turn at spinning the dreidel; the one with the highest spin has first turn. (Nun is highest, then gimmel, hey, and shin.) If there is a tie for highest, those who tied spin again.
Everyone puts one unit of the ante (penny, nut, etc.) into the pot.
The one who has first turn is followed in clockwise direction by all the others.
Player A spins the dreidel while everyone waits in utter suspense (in the interest of speeding up the game, some knock down the dreidel mid-spin instead of waiting for it to come to a rest).
If the dreidel lands on a...
Nun - נ
You've just wasted your time. Absolutely nothing happens. You may as well have taken a bathroom break instead of that useless spin. Better luck next time!
Nun stands for the Yiddish word nul, which means zero, nothing, nil. After your exercise in futility it's time now for the player to your left to take a spin.
If however your dreidel landed on a...
Gimmel - ג
Wow! Amazing! You did it! You get to take the whole pot! Take it quick and then do a little victory dance around the room. Pay no attention to the envious stares you are getting. You are an absolute dreidel pro!
Gimmel stands for gantz, which means whole. Everyone, including you, now puts another unit of the ante into the pot, and the person to your left tries his luck at spinning.
But, it's hard to be so lucky every time. Sometimes your dreidel will land on a...
Hey - ה
Okay, you could have done better, but you could have done worse. You get to take half of the pot. If the pot has an odd amount of units, don't try to split that penny, nut, or piece of chocolate in half. Leave it there. Take the high road. Let the others believe that it is beneath you to care...
Hey stands for halb, half. The pot has now been diminished, and it's time for the player to your left to take a stab at riches.
But don't complain. The dreidel could have landed on a...
Shin - ש
The absolute worst. The dregs. You now have to put another unit into the pot! You better figure out how to improve your spinning technique before you will be forced to take out a second mortgage on your home.
Shin is for shenk; yes, that means give. Your hope now is that the pot will still be around next time it is your turn to spin. Maybe then you'll get a gimmel and recoup your losses...
The absolute worst. The dregs. You now have to put another unit into the pot! You better figure out how to improve your spinning technique before you will be forced to take out a second mortgage on your home.
Shin is for shenk; yes, that means give. Your hope now is that the pot will still be around next time it is your turn to spin. Maybe then you'll get a gimmel and recoup your losses...
First it is lighting up the house with candles or oil, then fried foods galore, now teaching your children gambling. And all is sanctioned by your Rabbi. (He is normally the one winning all the gelt.)
It all began in Ancient Persia in the 4th century BCE. The Holy Temple that had stood in Jerusalem was destroyed more than 50 years earlier, and the Jews were subjects of the mighty Persian empire (Now known as Iran.) which extended over 127 lands.
Three years after King Ahasuerus ascended the Persian throne, when he felt secure in his new position, he celebrated by throwing a grand 180-day-long party for all his subjects. Following this extravagant gala, Ahasuerus hosted a smaller week-long party for the residents of the capital city of Shushan. In the palace's women's quarters, Ahasuerus' wife, Queen Vashti, hosted her own party for the Shushanite womenfolk.
On the seventh day of this party, Ahasuerus' heart "was merry with wine," and he commanded his wife Vashti to appear before all the partying men—he wanted to show them all her exquisite beauty. Vashti balked at this request, and at the advice of his advisor Memuchan, Ahasuerus ordered Vashti's execution.
When Ahasuerus' wrath dissipated, he was lonely for a wife. His servants suggested that he orchestrate a beauty pageant. Officers would be appointed in all the king's lands, and all beautiful girls would be brought to Ahasuerus. And the girl who would find favor in the king's eyes would be the new queen.
The leader of the Jews at that time was a Shushanite resident named Mordechai. He had a cousin, Esther, who was orphaned as a young girl. Mordechai raised her and treated her as a daughter. Though she had no desire to be the queen, Esther was forcibly taken to the king's harem, to participate in the contest. While all the other contestant beautified themselves with perfumes and lotions, Esther did nothing. But G‑d had His own plans. When Esther appeared before the king, he immediately liked her, and Esther became the new Queen of Persia. But as per Mordechai's directive, Esther refused to divulge her nationality—even to the king.
Shortly after Esther became queen, Mordechai overheard two of the king's chamberlains discussing a plot to assassinate the king. Mordechai had them reported, and the traitors were hanged.
Meanwhile, Haman, one of Ahasuerus' ministers, was promoted to the position of Prime Minister. Haman was a virulent Jew hater; in fact he was a descendant of the notoriously anti-Semitic nation of Amalek.
Immediately after his promotion, the king issued a decree ordering everyone to bow down whenever Haman appeared. Now Haman would walk around with a large idol hanging from a chain around his neck. When Mordechai, a proud Jew, refused to bow down, Haman was infuriated. He resolved to take revenge against all the Jews and threw lots to determine the "lucky" day when he would implement his plan. The lot fell on the 13th day of the Hebrew month of Adar.
Haman approached Ahasuerus and offered him 10,000 silver talents in exchange for permission to exterminate the Jews. Ahasuerus, who was no friend of the Jews either, told Haman, "The money is yours to keep, and the nation is yours to do with as you please."
Haman immediately sent proclamations to all the king's land. These declarations, sealed with the royal signet ring, ordered the people to rise up against the Jews and kill them all – men, women, and children – on the following 13th of Adar.
Mordechai became aware of the decree. He rent his garments and donned sackcloth. He sent a message to Esther, asking her to approach the king and beg him to spare her people. Esther responded that according to the rules anyone who entered the king's presence un-summoned would be put to death—unless the king extended to that person his golden scepter. "And I," Esther said, "have not been summoned by the king for thirty days already!"
Mordechai sent another message: "Do not think that you will escape the fate of all the Jews by being in the king's palace. For if you will remain silent at this time, relief and salvation will come to the Jews from another source, and you and the house of your father will be lost. And who knows if it is not for just such a time that you reached this royal position."
Esther agreed to approach the king. But she asked Mordechai to gather all the Jews in Shushan and let them all fast for three days and nights. And after this fast Esther would put her life in her hands and approach the king.
Mordechai complied with Esther's request. He gathered the Jews of Shushan – especially the children, 22,000 of them – and they fasted, repented and prayed to G‑d.
After three days of fasting, Esther donned royal garb and entered Ahasuerus' chambers. Immediately, the king extended his scepter. "What is it?" Ahasuerus asked. "What is your request?"
"I would like to invite the king and Haman to a small feast I have prepared," Esther responded.
So the king and Haman joined Esther for a wine-feast. During the feast, the king again asked Esther whether she had anything to request. "Yes," Esther responded. "I would appreciate if tomorrow, again, the king and Haman would join me for a feast. And then I will tell the king my request.
Haman left the party a happy and proud man. Oh the honor he was being accorded! But standing at the king's gate was Mordechai – who still refused to bow to Haman – and Haman was enraged. When he arrived home, his wife and wise advisors counseled him to erect a gallows, and then to go to the king and request permission to hang Mordechai. Haman excitedly went ahead and put up the gallows.
Sleep eluded the king that night, so he asked his servants to read for him from the Royal Chronicles. They complied with the king's orders. They read from the Chronicles how Mordechai saved the king's life when two of his chamberlains hatched a plot to kill him.
"Was he rewarded for this fine act?" Ahasuerus asked. "No he was not," the servants responded.
At that moment Haman entered the king's courtyard. His purpose? To ask the king's permission to hang Mordechai! Before Haman could utter a word, Ahasuerus addressed him: "My Haman, in your estimation, what shall be done to a person whom the king wishes to honor?"
Haman, who was certain that the king wished to honor him, responded: "Bring royal garment and a royal horse. And let one of the king's nobles dress the man and lead him on the horse through the city streets, proclaiming before him, 'So is done for the man whom the king wishes to honor!'"
"Great idea," Ahasuerus responded. "Now go get the garments and the horse and do so for Mordechai the Jew!"
Haman had no choice but to comply. On the next day he went and honored Mordechai as the king had ordered, and then immediately rushed to join the king and Esther for...
"What is your request?" a curious King Ahasuerus asked Esther at the feast.
"If I have found favor in your eyes, O King," Esther pleaded, "and if it pleases the king, let my life be granted me by my plea, and the life of my people by my request. For my people and I have been sold to be annihilated, killed and destroyed!" Esther then identified Haman as the evil person who wished to perpetrate this atrocity.
The king was greatly angered. When he was then informed that Haman had built a gallows for Mordechai, he ordered that Haman be hanged on that very gallows.
On that day, Haman's estate was given to Esther, and Mordechai was appointed Prime Minister in Haman's stead.
But Esther was far from satisfied. Haman was dead, but his evil decree was still in effect. According to Persian law, once a king issues a decree it can not be rescinded. But the king gave Mordechai and Esther permission, and they promptly wrote up a decree that countermanded Haman's edict. The decree granted the Jews permission to defend themselves against their enemies. And by this time, considering that all knew that the queen and Prime Minister were both Jewish, no one would prevent the Jews from doing just that!
And the Jews in Shushan were oh so happy. Celebrations abounded!
On the 13th of Adar that year, the Jews throughout the Persian Empire mobilized and killed the enemies who had wanted to kill them. In Shushan, among the dead were Haman's ten sons.
Esther asked the king's permission for the Jews in Shushan to have one more day to destroy their enemy—and the king acceded to her wish. On that day, the 14th of Adar, the Jews worldwide celebrated, and the Jews of Shushan killed more of their enemies, and also hung Haman's sons. The Jews of Shushan then rested and celebrated on the 15th of Adar.
Mordechai and Esther established a holiday to commemorate these amazing events. Jews worldwide celebrate on the 14th of Adar, while residents of walled cities – like Shushan – celebrate on the 15th of Adar. This holiday, called "Purim," is the most joyous holiday on the Jewish calendar.
All these events happened in Ancient Persia, today's Iran. And like ancient Persia there is a Haman ready to kill the Jews. He is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, a man who threatens to wipe out Israel and the Jewish people world wide. But like every despot that has tried to destroy the Jewish people, he will fall by the wayside.
On Adar 13, during the biblical story of Purim, the 10 sons of Haman were hanged (Esther 9:7). This would find eerie parallel over 2,000 years later when 10 top Nazi officials were hanged at the Nuremberg Trials. Incredibly, the Hebrew year of the hangings at Nuremberg, 5707, is encoded in the Book of Esther: In the listing of Haman's 10 sons, three Hebrew letters --taf, shin and zayin, representing the year 5707 -- are written unusually small. (This anomaly appears in every authentic Megillah scroll, written that way for over 2,000 years.)
The Maccabeats - Purim Song
In honor of Purim, jokes practical and not are played on each other. Gifts of food and wine to friends and family are given. Gifts to charity to help the poor and destitute are to be given. (Normally through a third party.)
Tonight starts the Holiday of Purim. Enjoy the day. Enjoy the jokes.
The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty G-d. In the midst of a civil war of unequaled magnitude and severity, which has sometimes seemed to foreign States to invite and to provoke their aggression, peace has been preserved with all nations, order has been maintained, the laws have been respected and obeyed, and harmony has prevailed everywhere except in the theater of military conflict; while that theater has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union. Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defense, have not arrested the plough, the shuttle or the ship; the axe has enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege and the battle-field; and the country, rejoicing in the consciousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years with large increase of freedom. No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High G-d, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy. It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and one voice by the whole American People. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to His tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquility and Union.
In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand and caused the Seal of the United States to be affixed.
Done at the City of Washington, this Third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the Independence of the Unites States the Eighty-eighth.
By the President: Abraham Lincoln
William H. Seward,
Secretary of State
Thanksgiving has nothing to do with Pilgrims, Indians, or Turkeys. Nor does it have anything to do with Football or Parades. (Sorry Macy's.) It has to do with a feast day, established by the government to thank G-d for the blessings that He has bestowed upon us. And given enough time, the anti-Christian element of the atheist movement will get the idea of Thanksgiving out of the American lexicon.
This used to be a solemn holiday. A day for the gathering of the family, Mother or Grandmother would cook her best foods, serve the meal on her best china, and smile that her family would be enjoying a wonderful feast.
Today it is a day for watching football on the Big Screen TV, attempt to cook a turkey, and stand outside in all kinds of weather to get the best deals at midnight.
But these guys know what the day is about:
(Click here if the video doesn't play.)
This poor kitty was just wanting to watch the Basketball game between Maccabi Tel Aviv vs. Bnei Hasharon.
A basketball team's canine mascot needed no help getting into character when a cat strayed onto the court during a televised match.
In a curious take on the age-old pursuit, Maccabi Tel Aviv mascot Donny the Dog sprang into action after the feline appeared during a match against Bnei Hasharon in Israel.
As Maccabi's players attacked their oppponents' end at the Zisman Arena in the city Ramat Gan, eastern Israel, the furry intruder was spotted in the middle of the court.
The skittish cat, no doubt startled by the size 11s of the ball players thundering around him, tried to sprint towards cheerleaders gathered at the Bnei Hasharon end.
But Donny, feeling the spirit of his canine alter-ego, decided to give chase.
Sensing the chase was on, the cat skidded across the court, changing direction to avoid Donny's lunging attempt at a tackle.
Despite desperately giving chase the mascot can't catch the nimble creature, who sprints easily beneath the stands.
Undeterred, and to the amusement of spectators, Donny tried to follow him under, but the mascot was foiled by his over-sized head.
There was no indication where the cat could have come from, but strays have become a problem in Israel in recent years.
I wonder what set the Kitty off. A laser pointer (Mr. Red Dot)? The Shoe Laces? The need to be seen on Television. What we do know is that he/she got away.
Passover begins soon and this should start getting you into the mood of this holiday. Produce by Aish.com, and set to Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody, it is the Exodus story like you have never seen before.
I hope you enjoy watching it.
Passover Rhapsody - A Jewish Rock Opera
Written by Aish.com Produced by Aish.com & AishConnections.com Directed by Shoot East http://shooteast.com Vocals by Mitch Clyman and Chanan Elias
Puppets Created by Ester Kogan-Pekar Puppeteering by Izaak Pekar Assistant Puppeteering by Nadia Tichonova
Camera by Yirmiyahu Vann Assistant Cameraman: Aaron Rotenberg
Production Design by Eli Kaplan-Wildmann Assistant Set Designer: Zoe Jurkowski Additional Design Assistance: Sarah Gutmann, Jenny Morris, Maia Hoberman Additional Construction and Assistance: Ariel Smith and Tehilla Zeff
Production Manager: Renana Levine
Special Thanks to Kosher Delight Josh Landes Midreshet Emunah V'Omanut and Queen
It all began in Ancient Persia in the 4th century BCE. The Holy Temple that had stood in Jerusalem was destroyed more than 50 years earlier, and the Jews were subjects of the mighty Persian empire (Now known as Iran.) which extended over 127 lands.
Three years after King Ahasuerus ascended the Persian throne, when he felt secure in his new position, he celebrated by throwing a grand 180-day-long party for all his subjects. Following this extravagant gala, Ahasuerus hosted a smaller week-long party for the residents of the capital city of Shushan. In the palace's women's quarters, Ahasuerus' wife, Queen Vashti, hosted her own party for the Shushanite womenfolk.
On the seventh day of this party, Ahasuerus' heart "was merry with wine," and he commanded his wife Vashti to appear before all the partying men—he wanted to show them all her exquisite beauty. Vashti balked at this request, and at the advice of his advisor Memuchan, Ahasuerus ordered Vashti's execution.
When Ahasuerus' wrath dissipated, he was lonely for a wife. His servants suggested that he orchestrate a beauty pageant. Officers would be appointed in all the king's lands, and all beautiful girls would be brought to Ahasuerus. And the girl who would find favor in the king's eyes would be the new queen.
The leader of the Jews at that time was a Shushanite resident named Mordechai. He had a cousin, Esther, who was orphaned as a young girl. Mordechai raised her and treated her as a daughter. Though she had no desire to be the queen, Esther was forcibly taken to the king's harem, to participate in the contest. While all the other contestant beautified themselves with perfumes and lotions, Esther did nothing. But G‑d had His own plans. When Esther appeared before the king, he immediately liked her, and Esther became the new Queen of Persia. But as per Mordechai's directive, Esther refused to divulge her nationality—even to the king.
Shortly after Esther became queen, Mordechai overheard two of the king's chamberlains discussing a plot to assassinate the king. Mordechai had them reported, and the traitors were hanged.
Meanwhile, Haman, one of Ahasuerus' ministers, was promoted to the position of Prime Minister. Haman was a virulent Jew hater; in fact he was a descendant of the notoriously anti-Semitic nation of Amalek.
Immediately after his promotion, the king issued a decree ordering everyone to bow down whenever Haman appeared. Now Haman would walk around with a large idol hanging from a chain around his neck. When Mordechai, a proud Jew, refused to bow down, Haman was infuriated. He resolved to take revenge against all the Jews and threw lots to determine the "lucky" day when he would implement his plan. The lot fell on the 13th day of the Hebrew month of Adar.
Haman approached Ahasuerus and offered him 10,000 silver talents in exchange for permission to exterminate the Jews. Ahasuerus, who was no friend of the Jews either, told Haman, "The money is yours to keep, and the nation is yours to do with as you please."
Haman immediately sent proclamations to all the king's land. These declarations, sealed with the royal signet ring, ordered the people to rise up against the Jews and kill them all – men, women, and children – on the following 13th of Adar.
Mordechai became aware of the decree. He rent his garments and donned sackcloth. He sent a message to Esther, asking her to approach the king and beg him to spare her people. Esther responded that according to the rules anyone who entered the king's presence un-summoned would be put to death—unless the king extended to that person his golden scepter. "And I," Esther said, "have not been summoned by the king for thirty days already!"
Mordechai sent another message: "Do not think that you will escape the fate of all the Jews by being in the king's palace. For if you will remain silent at this time, relief and salvation will come to the Jews from another source, and you and the house of your father will be lost. And who knows if it is not for just such a time that you reached this royal position."
Esther agreed to approach the king. But she asked Mordechai to gather all the Jews in Shushan and let them all fast for three days and nights. And after this fast Esther would put her life in her hands and approach the king.
Mordechai complied with Esther's request. He gathered the Jews of Shushan – especially the children, 22,000 of them – and they fasted, repented and prayed to G‑d.
After three days of fasting, Esther donned royal garb and entered Ahasuerus' chambers. Immediately, the king extended his scepter. "What is it?" Ahasuerus asked. "What is your request?"
"I would like to invite the king and Haman to a small feast I have prepared," Esther responded.
So the king and Haman joined Esther for a wine-feast. During the feast, the king again asked Esther whether she had anything to request. "Yes," Esther responded. "I would appreciate if tomorrow, again, the king and Haman would join me for a feast. And then I will tell the king my request.
Haman left the party a happy and proud man. Oh the honor he was being accorded! But standing at the king's gate was Mordechai – who still refused to bow to Haman – and Haman was enraged. When he arrived home, his wife and wise advisors counseled him to erect a gallows, and then to go to the king and request permission to hang Mordechai. Haman excitedly went ahead and put up the gallows.
Sleep eluded the king that night, so he asked his servants to read for him from the Royal Chronicles. They complied with the king's orders. They read from the Chronicles how Mordechai saved the king's life when two of his chamberlains hatched a plot to kill him.
"Was he rewarded for this fine act?" Ahasuerus asked. "No he was not," the servants responded.
At that moment Haman entered the king's courtyard. His purpose? To ask the king's permission to hang Mordechai! Before Haman could utter a word, Ahasuerus addressed him: "My Haman, in your estimation, what shall be done to a person whom the king wishes to honor?"
Haman, who was certain that the king wished to honor him, responded: "Bring royal garment and a royal horse. And let one of the king's nobles dress the man and lead him on the horse through the city streets, proclaiming before him, 'So is done for the man whom the king wishes to honor!'"
"Great idea," Ahasuerus responded. "Now go get the garments and the horse and do so for Mordechai the Jew!"
Haman had no choice but to comply. On the next day he went and honored Mordechai as the king had ordered, and then immediately rushed to join the king and Esther for...
"What is your request?" a curious King Ahasuerus asked Esther at the feast.
"If I have found favor in your eyes, O King," Esther pleaded, "and if it pleases the king, let my life be granted me by my plea, and the life of my people by my request. For my people and I have been sold to be annihilated, killed and destroyed!" Esther then identified Haman as the evil person who wished to perpetrate this atrocity.
The king was greatly angered. When he was then informed that Haman had built a gallows for Mordechai, he ordered that Haman be hanged on that very gallows.
On that day, Haman's estate was given to Esther, and Mordechai was appointed Prime Minister in Haman's stead.
But Esther was far from satisfied. Haman was dead, but his evil decree was still in effect. According to Persian law, once a king issues a decree it can not be rescinded. But the king gave Mordechai and Esther permission, and they promptly wrote up a decree that countermanded Haman's edict. The decree granted the Jews permission to defend themselves against their enemies. And by this time, considering that all knew that the queen and Prime Minister were both Jewish, no one would prevent the Jews from doing just that!
And the Jews in Shushan were oh so happy. Celebrations abounded!
On the 13th of Adar that year, the Jews throughout the Persian Empire mobilized and killed the enemies who had wanted to kill them. In Shushan, among the dead were Haman's ten sons.
Esther asked the king's permission for the Jews in Shushan to have one more day to destroy their enemy—and the king acceded to her wish. On that day, the 14th of Adar, the Jews worldwide celebrated, and the Jews of Shushan killed more of their enemies, and also hung Haman's sons. The Jews of Shushan then rested and celebrated on the 15th of Adar.
Mordechai and Esther established a holiday to commemorate these amazing events. Jews worldwide celebrate on the 14th of Adar, while residents of walled cities – like Shushan – celebrate on the 15th of Adar. This holiday, called "Purim," is the most joyous holiday on the Jewish calendar.
All these events happened in Ancient Persia, today's Iran. And like ancient Persia there is a Haman ready to kill the Jews. He is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, a man who threatens to wipe out Israel and the Jewish people world wide. But like every despot that has tried to destroy the Jewish people, he will fall by the wayside.
On Adar 13, during the biblical story of Purim, the 10 sons of Haman were hanged (Esther 9:7). This would find eerie parallel over 2,000 years later when 10 top Nazi officials were hanged at the Nuremberg Trials. Incredibly, the Hebrew year of the hangings at Nuremberg, 5707, is encoded in the Book of Esther: In the listing of Haman's 10 sons, three Hebrew letters --taf, shin and zayin, representing the year 5707 -- are written unusually small. (This anomaly appears in every authentic Megillah scroll, written that way for over 2,000 years.)
The Maccabeats - Purim Song
In honor of Purim, jokes practical and not are played on each other. Gifts of food and wine to friends and family are given. Gifts to charity to help the poor and destitute are to be given. (Normally through a third party.)
Tonight starts the Holiday of Purim. Enjoy the day. Enjoy the jokes.
Purim is one of the most joyous and fun holidays on the Jewish calendar. It commemorates a time when the Jewish people living in Persia were saved from extermination.
The story of Purim is told in the Biblical book of Esther. The heroes of the story are Esther, a beautiful young Jewish woman living in Persia, and her cousin Mordecai, who raised her as if she were his daughter. Esther was taken to the house of Ahasuerus, King of Persia, to become part of his harem. King Ahasuerus loved Esther more than his other women and made Esther queen, but the king did not know that Esther was a Jew, because Mordecai told her not to reveal her identity.
The villain of the story is Haman, an arrogant, egotistical advisor to the king. Haman hated Mordecai because Mordecai refused to bow down to Haman, so Haman plotted to destroy the Jewish people. In a speech that is all too familiar to Jews, Haman told the king, "There is a certain people scattered abroad and dispersed among the peoples in all the provinces of your realm. Their laws are different from those of every other people's, and they do not observe the king's laws; therefore it is not befitting the king to tolerate them." Esther 3:8. The king gave the fate of the Jewish people to Haman, to do as he pleased to them. Haman planned to exterminate all of the Jews.
Mordecai persuaded Esther to speak to the king on behalf of the Jewish people. This was a dangerous thing for Esther to do, because anyone who came into the king's presence without being summoned could be put to death, and she had not been summoned. Esther fasted for three days to prepare herself, then went into the king. He welcomed her. Later, she told him of Haman's plot against her people. The Jewish people were saved, and Haman was hanged on the gallows that had been prepared for Mordecai.
The book of Esther is unusual in that it is the only book of the Bible that does not contain the name of G-d. In fact, it includes virtually no reference to G-d. Mordecai makes a vague reference to the fact that the Jews will be saved by someone else, if not by Esther, but that is the closest the book comes to mentioning G-d. Thus, one important message that can be gained from the story is that G-d often works in ways that are not apparent, in ways that appear to be chance, coincidence or ordinary good luck.
Purim is celebrated on the 14th day of Adar, which is usually in March. The 13th of Adar is the day that Haman chose for the extermination of the Jews, and the day that the Jews battled their enemies for their lives. On the day afterwards, the 14th, they celebrated their survival. In cities that were walled in the time of Joshua, Purim is celebrated on the 15th of the month, because the book of Esther says that in Shushan (a walled city), deliverance from the massacre was not complete until the next day. The 15th is referred to as Shushan Purim.
For those who do not know where Persia was, it is now the modern nation of Iran. And today there is a modern Haman. He is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. A man who is threatening like Haman to wipe the Jewish people off the face of the Earth. I wonder if he is of Haman's bloodline. Or it it just something Persian think of doing naturally?
An interesting fact that happened on a Purim past is:
On Adar 13, during the biblical story of Purim, the 10 sons of Haman were hanged (Esther 9:7). This would find eerie parallel over 2,000 years later when 10 top Nazi officials were hanged at the Nuremberg Trials. Incredibly, the Hebrew year of the hangings at Nuremberg, 5707, is encoded in the Book of Esther: In the listing of Haman's 10 sons, three Hebrew letters -- taf, shin and zayin, representing the year 5707 -- are written unusually small. (This anomaly appears in every authentic Megillah scroll, written that way for over 2,000 years.) Incredibly, when Nazi officer Julius Streicher ascended the gallows to be hanged at Nuremberg, he shouted, "Purimfest 1946."
On Purim the Megillah (Book of Esther) is read. Every time the name Haman is read, a loud noise must be made. Usually one uses a groggers (as seen in the picture on the bottom), other noise makers can be used. The horns one uses at New Years and birthday celebrations is also acceptable. But under no circumstances should you ever use an Marine Horn (as seen in the picture on the right). Can you imagine what this would do to the windows of a synagogue? Let alone the embarrassment to your parents? And then there is the safety issue to take into account. Let's just say it was a bad idea at the time and leave it at that. Just stick to the grogger, and you will be fine.
We dress up in costumes, to let our defenses down and open up to the deeper reality of ourselves and our world. Our costumes normally reflect the holiday with dozens of Esthers, Mordechais, etc... One enterprising youngster in Sderot dressed up as a Grad Rocket last year. This year one is dressing up as a Hamas fighter. Try doing that one Halloween. You will be sure to scare your neighbors.
On Purim expect to be subjected to many practical jokes. It is a Purim tradition and enjoyable one as long as you are doing the jokes, and not receiving them. So tomorrow, this blog just might have a few posts that aren't exactly Kosher. But it is in the spirit of the holiday and beer that in mind.
Purim is a time of gift-giving. Gifts of food and wine are given to family, friends, and especially those who are poorer than you. It is a time of great joy and feasting. And most especially drinking. It is the only time of the year you are commanded to get drunk. Not tipsy, but rip-roaring, stinking drunk. You are commanded to get so drunk that you cannot tell the difference between the names of the Blessed Mordechai and the Wicked Haman. And remember that even if you and your friends are passing around a couple of bottle of fine vodka, don't even consider using that marine horn I know you have hidden in your bag. Vodka and a marine horn just don't mix. I can tell you that from personal experience.
The most important thing about Purim is to have fun.
Here is a little fun to get you started:
The Maccabeats - Purim Song
The Lyrics:
Stand stand for a tale so grand
Shushan is the place where it all began
The hidden miracle
One man, second in command
Slay all the Jews was his wicked plan
A scheme so miserable
He chose a day for the disaster
It’s ironic what came after
He didn’t know a girl named Esther
Would turn it upside down
So raise your glass if you can see the hidden meaning
It's right in front of you
We will never be never be anything but proud to tell the story
V'nahafoch hu (it was turned upside down)
Won’t you come on and come on and raise your glass
just come on and come on and raise your glass
Esther became the queen
Cuz’ G-d was pulling strings from behind the scenes
She wore the royal crown
Three days the Jews just prayed,
Queen Esther risked her life went to save the day
She took Haman down
The streets were filled with celebration
Everyone ate Hamantashen
Jubilation for the nation
Ken tihiyeh lanu… (So should it be for us)
So raise your glass if you can see the hidden meaning
It's right in front of you
We will never be never be anything but proud to tell the story
V'nahafoch hu
Won’t you come on and come on and raise your glass
Just come on and come on and raise your glass
So get your costumes on
Make noise and drown out Haman
Don’t drink like a fool
And remember and remember
What the day’s about…
So raise your glass if you see G-d in hidden places,
He's right in front of you,
We will never be never be anything but proud to tell our story
V'nahafoch hu
So raise your glass if you can see the hidden meaning,
It's right in front of you,
We will never be never be anything but proud to tell the story
V'nahafoch hu
Won’t you come on and come on and raise your glass just come on and come on and raise your glass…
It have been ambushed by Snoopy the Goon. I now have to come clean about 7 things I love, then tag 7 victims people in return.
So here goes:
My 7 Greatest Loves.
1. My Family. 2. A good book, preferably a classic (I'm especially fond of Jane Austin) 3. The sound and smell of a summer thunderstorm. 4. A good bottle of wine or a good beer. Either one is fine with me. 5. Good Food, especially if there is a nice piece of meat or fish to go with it. 6. Good Friends. Nothing like having a bunch of friends over for #4 and #5. 7. Our cat Kara.
